Friday, July 12, 2013

Cheese101 reviews Sharknado

Okay so when I saw the trailer for Syfy's newest B-movie, I was sort of excited. I can't lie I was excited to see this rediculous action romp. I will be reviewing this movie as a B-movie B-movie, not a mainstream movie. But what makes a ssuccessful B-movie? I'll answer that so you can put my review in context. A good B-movie has to have acting so bad it makes you laugh, effects so cheap they make you weak, and plots that sound like they came out of the mind of 7 year old child.
So how does Sharknado do in all of these respects. Let's start with the acting... it sucks, I mean it's absolutely awful, and at times it works in the formula. Unfortunately the thing that stops it, is the plot and story. What we see in the trailer is that it's about a giant tornado that has a bunch of sharks in it. What it's really about is a divorced man that trys to save his family during a hurricane off the coast of California ( this is impossible of course since hurricanes can only form in the Atlantic, the ones the form in the Pacific are Typhoons). While the streets flood a bunch of sharks come into the city and swim around and eat people. So the first hour consists of the characters driving around and being dramatic. The Sharknado doesnt even come into play until the final 15 minutes of the movie, which are by far the best parts. So that already ties into the second point being the plot. The plot of a movie entitled Sharknado should have been centered around the ludirous idea of a tornado with a bunch of sharks in it. Instead Sharknado is a phony drama, the plot is full of yawns and snoozes. The final 15 minutes however were amazing, it's what I was expecting and hoping for. It's full offlying sharks killing people in various ways, and people shooting these sharks as well as slicing them in half with chainsaws. However it was too little too late tp save the story of this movie. Why couldn't the whole movie have been that?
Okay other than that there are the effects, they were pretty laughable and would have worked well with the formula had the plot been constructed better. The lighting was random and inconsistent, the CG was crappy, and there was the most illused stock shark footage I've seen in a film ever.
Overall, Sharknado was horribly dissapointing, it could have been an extremely emorable B-movie, instead it tried to be more than what it was, which was a formula for disaster. Now it's not even that enjoyable to watch. It has failed in it's purpose.

Sharknado gets a 3/10

-Thanks for listening

1 comment:

  1. That's actually pretty sad. I'm not gonna lie, I am a huge fan of Asylum, and a few of their recent movies were actually close to unironically "good". It sounds like this took a step back.